After watching reruns of a show tonight, I started thinking about what it would do to my son if I were to die. I have come to the conclusion that I never can. Ever. I have to live until the end of time-and for that matter, so does he!
I never knew true love until the moment I laid eyes on my son. The thought of losing him, or him having to live his life without his mom just kills me. He would still have his dad, but I have been there every day of his life. I may not be the world’s greatest mother, but I am HIS mother. While I have a whole world of issues with my mom, I can’t imagine losing her, and I don’t ever want to do that to him, either. In the same respect, I now understand why they say parents are not supposed to outlive their children. He is my whole world, and I can’t picture going through a day without him, much less the rest of my life! I have been so lucky with him. He’s healthy, he’s happy, he’s smart, and he’s loving. I have been blessed. He is two, he has his tantrums, but they’re not out of control. He’s the sweetest little boy, and I look forward to us both living a long, happy life together. Fingers crossed!